When you have a 3 hour train journey ahead of you, you have time to think. When you have time to think, you think about everything. When I thought about everything, I realised that I complain a lot. But there is a good side to it, and I think it will give us all a perspective we need on life.
I constantly complain, even my bosses and colleagues say that. I’m never satisfied. When I get a laptop, I want a desktop at work. When I get a software to work with, I want another one. When my office moves, I don’t want to move. When i’m offered fast food, I complain about the unhealthy diet and when i’m given healthy food, I complain about too much dieting.
But why am I like this? Am I actually annoyed by all this? People close to me know that I make the best out of every situation, any situation. So, what does all this complaining get me? Satisfaction? Maybe. Perhaps the idea that I have the last word on a matter is more satisfying than having that thing. “I’ll use it but you should know i’m not happy about it”, I’d be a millionaire if I had a dollar for every time I said that. My mind is frustrated with and looking for a way to optimise the use of available resources at the same time. It’s not very healthy, but somehow it just works smoothly for me.
Is this an addiction, an addiction to always having the last word, to always cribbing? Now that I think about it, the answer is yes. I’m always positive, i’m always happy with what I get, I enjoy life as it comes. But, this happy-go-lucky attitude comes with the luxury of criticism. “Bombay is too crowded and expensive”, ” The local trains are jam-packed”,”I live too far away from work”, the list is endless. Yet, I love it all. I like it when i’m running to catch my train, I love to text my boss i’m gonna be late because there was too much rush at the station and hence I couldn’t board my train, I love being challenged, constantly. Nevertheless, if you ask me how’s it going, my answer would be “Mumbai is terrible, too much travel, too many people”. The weird pleasure it gives me to showcase a painful point of view is worrisome. I am more often than not perceived as a cribber, and risk to be ignored. After careful analysis, I figured that being negative about a situation and then taking it on positively is what keeps me going. No one can be cheerful about everything. I just happen to enjoy my challenges after I am done announcing how much I hate it. I may not even hate it, I have the right to be mad and I damn right use that right of mine.
Should I change? Definitely. If you have intellectual Colleagues and friends they’ll see the true you, but if you have friends and colleagues who in general see how you behave,you are leaving a very bad impression. I have seen that happening. This is the thing they say about Polish people too. Poles complain a lot. In winter they say it’s too cold, in summer they complain about being too hot. Katya used to be annoyed by it as well. She’d tell me i’m behaving like a Polish teenager, which somehow I took as a compliment, grave mistake. You can take me out of Poland, but you can’t take the Pole out of me. Back to the topic, yes I love to complain and I also love to live through the things I complain about. I’m sure I must change, I just don’t know how. Maybe you can help me out, care to leave a suggestion in the comment section below?
Cover Pic: Chchurches